Sunday, July 23, 2006

811 A Confession, and more "English"

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Used to be, when I had a certain problem, I'd eat an orange. An orange took care of it, usually within 6 or 8 hours, especially if I nibbled some of the peel, too.

Over the last two years, I've discovered something faster. Starbucks Frappuccino (in the little glass bottle in every deli and gas station) works better, and it invariably works within 20 minutes. I can actually feel the stuff moving through.

So lately, I use it not only when I have the rare problem, but if I'll be driving a few hours, or going somewhere where a restroom won't be available, I'll drink a bottle a half hour before I leave the house. Potential problem ... um ... eliminated.

I don't know how the subject came up, but I was surprised to hear that it has the same effect on Daughter.

Anyone else find that Starbucks Frappuccino has an immediate laxative effect?

--------------------------------------

Speaking of rest rooms, that reminds me of another "speak English" story. On that 1987 trip, Daughter and I were waiting for a train in a Welsh village. We needed a bathroom. I walked up to a uniformed man in the station and asked him where the rest room was. He said "We don't have a rest room, but there's a bench out by the tracks. You can use that."

Daughter and I looked at each other, shrugged, went outside, and sure enough, there was a bench on the apron. We looked at the bench, we looked at each other, and we laughed. Daughter said she didn't care what he said, she wasn't going to use it!

Of course, he had interpreted "rest room" as "waiting room". We should have asked for "the toilet". But in the US, the word "toilet" is never used in polite company except in the context of buying, repairing, or replacing the ceramic unit. One never implies actually sitting on one. The room it's in is the bathroom (even if there's no tub), the lavatory, the men's or ladies' room, or, most politely, the rest room. Among informal friends, one might ask for the throne room, the john, or the potty. But anyone who asks for the toilet would be viewed as rather crude.

It's that mental image. (Oops - sorry....)

1 comment:

Kate said...

Maybe Starbucks should change their logo from a mermaid to a toilet?

There was always confusion as a child at my Great Aunt's house as she referred to the toilet as "the stool". I usually would end up saying something along the lines of I didn't need a stool as I already had a chair.