Saturday, July 28, 2007

1405 Dear Diary - Weekend in NJ Part 1

Saturday, July 28, 2007

So, Thursday I drove down, checked into hotel, went over to Daughter's, had dinner there, other Mother-in-law (K-Mom (I'm S-Mom)) arrived, chatter, natter, back to hotel, The Man arrived, talk, etc.

Friday, bye-bye to The Man, he went to work, Daughter was working until 2 pm, back to Daughter's in afternoon, play with kittens (Titus is batty. He's NEVER still!), chatter, natter.

Now, I thought we were going to the Monmouth County Fair Friday evening. A friend of Daughter was clogging that evening, and Daughter very much wanted to see her. I thought Hercules knew Daughter wanted to go to the fair. But sometime in the late afternoon, Hercules and his mother decided they wanted to see the Simpsons movie, and, so, we went to the movie. Daughter was very tired, having got little sleep during the week, and I was tired, having got little sleep the night before, and Daughter and I mostly slept through the movie. The fact that it was freezing in the theater contributed.

Movie review - if you're not a rabid Simpsons fan, forget it.

The theater was near where Daughter and Hercules are buying a house (a different house - the "ugly house" got to be too much of a hassle, this one is progressing much more quickly), so we went to look at the house. Couldn't go inside, the sellers still live there, but we walked around the neighborhood, which is much nicer than by the ugly house. It's about a block from Raritan Bay(?), so we then walked along the seawall along the bay, too. Very nice. (Quite a hike on rock and broken concrete in high heeled sandals, by the way.)

Then dinner. The waiter forgot to bring half our food (forgot Hercules' french fries, K-Mom's coffee, Daughter's salad, and my soup, and I'm not exaggerating!), and we had to wrestle him to the ground to get the check, and never did catch him to pay the tab - I had to go into the bar and threaten mayhem if someone didn't take my money, NOW!

So we never made it to the fair.

Daughter had requested that I come this weekend. So here I am. Surprise - they're registered in a race this morning, and the three of them are going to an upstate conference (on a topic I don't care to go to) this afternoon and evening, staying over in a hotel there tonight. I guess Daughter thought I could amuse myself with The Man today and tonight. Of course, nobody told me ahead of time, so nobody told him, and he's someone you have to schedule way ahead of time, so here I sit. I brought some books and movie DVDs. Friday morning The Man said I really have to see Sicko, and I mentioned it to Hercules, and he, um, had a copy, which he copied for me, so that's my plans for the evening.

Tomorrow I'll check out, visit the kids a bit more, and then head home.

And I'm drinking The Man's beer. Strange. I don't drink beer.

1404 Not Goodbye

Saturday, July 28, 2007

[Later - edited out parts which do not belong to me.]

The Man reserved a suite for us in a Residence Inn near Daughter's home. Livingroom, bedroom, kitchen, bath. We had an opportunity for lots of talk on Thursday and Friday, and I'm feeling a bit better about him. After my experience with Roman I am extremely "gun-shy" about being played, and I had been feeling neglected, which leads to feeling used, and I was fully prepared to tell him I didn't want to see him any more.

It's not like he convinced me otherwise. I haven't been sold a bill of goods. He explained what his priorities have been lately, and why, and I completely understand. He also said that those priorities were unlikely to change in the near future, and I would have to make my own decision as to whether I could accept that or not, but he couldn't do much about it.

Now that I understand a little bit about what's been going on with him, I can accept it. (I think he could at least do a better job of letting me know what's going on, so I'm not left to draw my own conclusions, but he's very reluctant to dump complaints and problems on others.) That doesn't mean everything is wonderful, but it's at least sort of ok. I guess. I'm willing to give it a little more time and patience. He doesn't need me chewing on his backside, too.

What's bugging me now is that I could alleviate at least one of his problems, and he probably knows that. I respect that he hasn't asked. If he did, it would probably scare me off. We're not "there" yet. It bothers me a little that I'm reluctant to volunteer, too. I don't know him well enough to know whether he'd be grateful or offended.

And I don't know which I'd prefer.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

1403 'Nother Duh

There was a story on TV news tonight about a town's testing of their emergency warning sirens.

It reminded me of The Company's tests: "Blaaaaap! This is a test of the emergency announcement system. If you cannot hear this message, call extension xxxx."


A bunch of us decided to call every half hour on a day they didn't do the test, and tell them we didn't hear the message. It took them a few rounds to "get it".

1402 Caca-phony

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

I'm working through the to do list. Paid bills, set the recorder, cleaned the litter box, wrapped and mailed a birthday present, bought groceries (mostly cat food), packed a suitcase (except for the clothes), watered all the plants, updated the calendar, copied some CDs, printed off some lists. I still have to do laundry, wash dishes, and clean out the car.


I like my new TVs, but there's a problem.

I often have four on at the same time, in the kitchen (digital), livingroom (analog), bedroom (analog), and den (digital), so that as I move around the house I can listen or glance if anything interesting is on and not miss much.

The problem is that the digital broadcast is four seconds behind the analog.


Not pleasant.

1401 Warning

Rate Your Site

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
  • murder (5x)

  • hell (4x)

  • sex (3x)

  • xxx (2x)

  • steal (1x)

Harumph! I'm insulted!

I was hoping for at least an "X".

[Later: Good Grief! "Girl with a one-track mind" got a PG!!!!! She's cleaner than I am? This is very very wrong!]

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

1400 Priorities, Blah

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

I'm supposed to be doing laundry and paying bills so I can go to the museum tomorrow, and to New Jersey Thursday.

Instead, I've spent much of the evening writing emails. I wanted to peruse Steve-in-England's websites, and then fill him in on my past 20-plus years. Unfortunately, I think more than I write, and I write slowly. (If I wrote everything I thought, recalling the past twenty years, the email would be a novel.) And I couldn't spend all that time on him without also paying attention to more immediate friends.

I've been typing a lot today. I'm surprised my fingernails haven't worn down.

I think I'm going to have to go to the museum on Monday.

1399 Shopping

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

My ears are not pierced, so I don't wear expensive earrings (I worry about them falling off, although in my entire life I have lost only one earring, and I wasn't even wearing it at the time it escaped), and it's getting harder and harder to find decent clip earrings. They don't exist in local stores, except for that one rack in the el-cheapo store.

When I decide I need a particular color or style, I shop on eBay for them, or the online antique and vintage stores.

Well, three weeks ago I bought a beautiful rose satin jacket, and I decided that the perfect thing to wear under it would be a black sequined tube top. I hit virtually every clothing store in two counties-worth of malls, and no one can even remember seeing one in ages.

I gave up.

About the same time I had bought a pink satin Chinese blouse, and decided I needed pink pearl earrings to wear with it. Found two pair (one stud, one dangle) on eBay - nice, real pearls, and inexpensive.

Did YOU make the connection?

I can't believe it took so long for my lightbulb to go on.

I found six black sequined tube tops on eBay, and six more in online vintage and dance supply stores.


Monday, July 23, 2007

1398 Blam!

Monday, July 23, 2007

This is a video of a bunch of guys shooting, and recoil blows them across the room. [Feeds may not show the video - click on the post title to see it.]

I was reminded of the time the guys on the rifle range at the base gave me a big one. It was so heavy and my arms were so short I couldn't hold it up. I kept tipping forward. So they had me lie on my stomach on the gravel to shoot it.

This was 1961. No sissy ear protection. I was 16 years old, and weighed about 103 lbs.

It threw me three feet back on my belly, skidding, skinned up my elbows, thighs, and hip bones really badly, dislocated my collarbone, and left my ears ringing for a week. I've been a tad hard of hearing in my right ear ever since.

But I hit the target ... and decided not to take up elephant hunting.

1397 Phone Change

Monday, July 23, 2007

I got some business done this morning. I am so proud of myself! (Yeah, sarcasm.)

I have reservations for my visit to Daughter this coming weekend.

I called and reserved tickets for a show in August.

I called and cancelled the old ISP, now that I've had the highspeed link for about a month and it seems to be working.

I called and cancelled the second house line.

I called and changed the telephone service on the remaining main house line to one which provides unlimited free nationwide long distance, and includes call waiting, caller id, and transfer of calls to my cell phone - all for less than I'd been paying for regular service on the two lines.

Life is good.


In the previous post I'd mentioned the lawyer I had dated briefly in February of 2006. He had given me his family homepage URL, so after thinking about it a bit ("Wonder what he's doing now?") I looked him up. No, it's NOT stalking! Not the same thing at all. He put himself out there so that people could look! He expects and welcomes it.

Well, I got a bit of a surprise.

I had told him back then that I was going to be very slow and cautious about getting into physical involvement, and I told him why. He didn't react well to that. I figured that he just wanted someone to sleep with RIGHT NOW!, and that's why. That turned me off. It turns out on his side it might have been more subtle, that he saw himself in my story and realized he wasn't ready, that he could be unfair to me. In fact, he said "I guess I'm not really ready", and I agreed. But I was thinking about the divorce hangover and the shingles.

His site is mostly photos, and there's a lot more there now than back when. Almost all of them are of him and a woman, on vacation, at events, having fun, snuggling. Photos from long before we met, and from long after.

It looks like he had and has a long-term relationship, and he must have started up with me during perhaps a small disagreement, "on a break".

Thank you, Mr. Lawyer, for not involving me in a triangle. Your lady is very pretty, you look happy (I notice the additional pounds), and I hope you'll remember next time you have a spat - don't go looking for someone else until you're sure it's over. With luck and communication, maybe it won't be over.

Sunday, July 22, 2007

1396 Sunday

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Today I touched up my roots - that "Jay Leno" patch right at the top of my forehead.

Then I headed for Phonecia (finally). The store has my name, number, and request stuck right above the cash register. They hadn't called because a new delivery hadn't come in. I got the card with the manager's name and the store number, so I'll have to call to see if they can special-order for me.

Returning home I decided to turn onto route 212 to Woodstock. I've been very surprised at how low the water level is everywhere, it seems like we've had a lot of rain, more rainy days than sunny, and I wanted to look at Cooper Lake. Rte. 212 from Mt. Tremper to Bearsville is a nice drive. It winds back and forth across the (almost empty) creek, and there are beautiful views of the mountains.

At one point near the hamlet of Willow, I saw cars parked all along the road, and I wondered what was going on. That reminded me that Barushka's Tribal Bonfire Hafla was today. I briefly considered going straight home to get the directions and then heading to the hafla, but it's way the heck down by New Paltz, and I was starting to feel guilty about how much I have to do and how little I've been accomplishing, and I just decided to stay home. I suspect I missed a good evening. It was good last year, when it poured, forcing everyone to cram into a large carport.

I took the circuit around the Cooper Lake. It was a bit low, but not as bad as others.

I went on through Woodstock. There was some kind of protest demonstration going on at the village green, and it look like they had a drum circle. I wanted to stop, but there were no parking spaces anywhere.

From there I took county 32 down to Kingston. I have often driven that road at night, in the winter, in snow, after a drink or two, and I was just fine with it. So it always amazes me when I drive it in daylight. Man, that's a scary road! It must have been laid out by a snake. I guess the difference is that at night I drive it a lot slower, so I don't notice the curves as much.

Instead of taking 9W to the bridge, on impulse I took a backroad that dumped me onto state 32, thence to the bridge and home.


On the show "Survivor", the last three survivors "do the torch tour", visiting the torches of everyone who had been eliminated, and remembering them.

Today was almost like a torch tour for me.

Looking at the Esopus near Phonecia reminded me of a guy I knew in the early 80's, Steve. He was in Kingston on an international assignment with The Company. He returned to England and got married. When Daughter and I were in England in the late 80s we tried to get together (Daughter and I were on a narrowboat on the canals, moving around a lot), but there was a lot of phone tag and it didn't happen. I wondered what happened to him.

Then Cooper Lake reminded me of one of my online dates. He was a retired lawyer. We had a few dates, but I was still smarting from male betrayal, and he was suffering from a nasty divorce and a bad case of shingles, and neither of us was very good company. He had taken me to Cooper's Lake and said that he liked to sit on the bank and read. Today was one of the few nice days we've had lately, and when I passed the spot he liked, I thought of him. I wondered what had happened to him. It's more than a year later. I wouldn't mind meeting him again. I know where he lives, and where he has his coffee and paper on nice mornings, but ... no ....

Driving down county 32, I passed a building lot on the side of a mountain, next to the creek, that Jay loved. He had tried to buy it when he first arrived in NY from Texas, but the seller, although willing to sell, had all kinds of legal problems, and after six months of haggling, Jay gave up and bought this lot. But the other was always his first choice, and every time we passed it, he mourned it. Well, I know what happened to him.

I turned off 9w onto the back road on impulse, mainly because I hadn't been down that road in more than 30 years. The apartment where Raleigh lived is still there. I didn't think it would be. He was the first guy I seriously dated in this area after leaving Ex#1, way back in 1968. He was from North Carolina by way of Chicago. The romance ended when I discovered he had a wife and three kids still in Chicago. I wondered what happened to him.

Perhaps a half mile down the road was the apartment of a friend of Raleigh's, who made like he wanted to comfort me, but then attempted to rape me. I don't much care what happened to him.

I am the survivor. So many others are gone. All those burned-out torches.


I was curious, so when I got home, I Googled Steve. I found him! There're five or six folks with his name, but there was only one whose Google blurb mentioned England, and The Company. His homepage has him still in England, still in love with his lady, still working for The Company, and that's sure enough his picture. I sent off an email, and got an immediate reply! How cool is that? He was happy to hear from me. We've got some catching up to do.

So then, curiosity, I tried for Raleigh. He has a rather unusual but charming name, but even so, I didn't expect to find him. I didn't. I did find a young man with the same name, quite the athlete, the location fits, and the kid looks just like the original. Lighter complexion, but the same face. Interesting. I wonder....

One of the five cold torches has been relit, and it's a good one.

That's pretty durn neat.

1395 Van Setback

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Roman had said that he always makes copies of CDs to take in the car, never the originals. Until this laptop arrived, that was difficult for me, but last night I made some copies of favorites and it was easy.

A CD that The Man had made for me works on the PC, the house player, and in ONE of the vehicles, but won't play in the other (I forget which). So after I burned the CDs last night, I took them outside and tried them in the Aerio and the minivan. They worked.

However - I haven't driven the minivan in a little over a week, and it was fine then. Last night when I started it, the "check engine" light went on.

Not again. Please not again! Not after thousands of dollars, rental cars, and the forced purchase of the Aerio last year.

I opened and tightened the gas cap, and we'll see if that fixes it.