Divorce is tortious, tortuous, and torturous.
-- Silk --
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-- Silk --
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I had the blood draw last week. As usual, I told the phlebotomist about my problem with sticks in the arm, that the hand works better, as usual she blew me off and went for the arm, "Oh, this won't hurt at all", as usual it felt like a branding iron and the nails on my other hand gripped the armrest so hard I punctured the fabric-backed vinyl upholstery. She seemed surprised. That's absolutely the last time I will be ignored. It will never happen again. That is a vow. I'll refuse and walk out if they don't listen to me.
The next day, Friday, I went in for the CT scan and x-rays. The X-ray technician took a several shots, then came out of his little room and asked if I was in pain. I was perfectly relaxed, lying on the machine bed, eyes closed, silent, almost asleep. I said, "No, should I be?" He didn't answer, went back behind his partition and took several more, moving me a little now and then. So now I'm worried. What might he have seen that would prompt him to ask if I was in pain? Why did he take so many more pictures than were necessary?
I hope I'll find out tomorrow at the urologist's appointment. I've had no calls, so I suppose there's nothing too very exciting. Probably just another stone on the right side.
I've got a few things bothering me right now (not the health stuff, that's just annoying) and I have no one I can talk with about it. It's big, family-type things that have been growing for thirty years and coming to a head now. It's a little depressing, because I don't know what to do about it.
I'd really like to talk with The Man, but he's being a bit distant right now. He's got his reasons, but it's still another bothersome thing, but not the biggest.
Another bothersome thing is a cash flow problem. I sold stock from portfolios in my own name, not the investment portfolio Piper manages, to buy this house, and what Piper doesn't seem to realize is that much of my income was dividend checks from that stock. So my income is down by 25%, but I'm paying utilities and taxes on two houses now. I'm not going to starve, but I'm scrambling to pay the bills without selling more stock and cutting my income even more.
I canceled the house phone at the old house. The monthly bill for that phone was less than $30, but I don't need it anymore. So I freaked when I got the final bill, and it was $280! They charged me $250 for "Tier 1 Auto Renewal Termination Fee"! What!? What the hell is that!?
So I called. They said I had agreed to some special low-cost plan that had an early termination fee. I asked when this plan was supposed to end. The guy said "In five weeks." I said, that makes it the first week in May? He said yes. I freaked. "That means I signed up for it last May? Last May I was aware I would be moving. At that time I thought I'd be moving in the fall. There's no way on this God's earth a) that I would sign up for ANY plan with an early termination fee if there's any other option, b) that I would agree to that when I knew I'd be moving. There's something very wrong here."
So he checked. Turns out that I'd agreed to the plan several years ago (and I'm positive no "termination fee" had been mentioned), and the plan is automatically renewed every year. I pointed out that after the first contract term, you can no longer charge a termination fee without active renewal of the agreement. Automatic renewal changes the terms to monthly. Plus, even if the fee still existed, when I called to terminate service, the rep should have mentioned it. She didn't. There's no way I am going to pay $250 for 5 weeks of non-service when I could have just paid the $40 five more weeks would have cost!
So he forgave the $250.
I wonder how many people would go ahead and pay it? That's a complete ripoff.
[Update: Wow! I found this article dated October 2009, that says the NY Attorney General went after Frontier and told them they couldn't charge the termination fee without telling customers it existed, and they couldn't charge it on auto-renewals, and they had to refund all those fees they had collected! Wow! And they're STILL DOING IT!!! I think maybe I'll write a letter to the NY Attorney General.]
The Hairless Hunk is taking a class about 25 minutes north of here this week, and Monday of next week. We got together for dinner on Monday. That was kind of a mess. We went to a Thai place near his hotel. I like Thai, and they had some really interesting things on the menu, but the table was very wide, and the place was very crowded and noisy, and I couldn't hear him, and I wasn't there for interesting food, I was there to talk, so we left and went looking for someplace else, and since neither of us knew anyplace we ended up at a truly yucky diner-but-not-a-diner with blah food. But at least the place was empty, and quiet.
I didn't mention any of the stuff that's been depressing me, but simply being able to be with someone who does care and would and could sympathize and offer advice if I asked for it, was enough. I feel a little better, although I still don't know what to do.
We had originally sort of planned that some evening he'd come down here and see the house. I figured it might be difficult because he'd probably have classwork in the evenings. Yesterday he called and said, yeah, stuff to read and memorize. Sad. I was looking forward to showing him the vehicle buried in the backyard (his comment was that I may have found Jimmy Hoffa).
Suzy the Suzuki is still at the old house. On a visit in February, I think, the first time all winter that she wasn't buried in snow, The Hunk and I started her. I was pleased that she started right up with no hesitation, but then she started blowing gray smoke out of the vents, something was burning, so I turned her off. We checked for beasty nests in the engine compartment, but didn't find anything obvious. I need to get her down here. My cars still all have NY plates. I've got to get them inspected and registered here, but I don't want to do that until they're all here, because otherwise it will complicate the insurance. BUT, Hal is due for inspection this month! Ack.
The Hunk and I had discussed my going back with him on Friday evening, then I can spend two days working at the old house and get Suzy into the shop on Monday, and then bring her back. BUT, that doesn't work because that leaves me stranded at the old house with no car until Suzy is fixed, and there's no guarantee on that. Plus, Hercules goes back to work on Monday, and I had promised Daughter I'd be here to help when she's suddenly alone with the baby.
It would be best if I could drive myself up there this week and arrange for Suzy's fixing now, and then, assuming she's ready to go by Tuesday, I could go back with The Hunk after his class on Monday, and drive Suzy back here Tuesday. BUT I have the urologist's appointment tomorrow, and I don't know what will happen then.
If I don't go back with The Hunk on Monday, I won't be able to bring Suzy down until Piper and his daughter visit and I can go back up with them.
I've got a feeling that somehow this is going to end up involving either a rental car or an insurance mess.
Seems like nothing is going smoothly these days. All these nit-pickin' minnow nibbles --- and I still have the big "unmentioned" problem that's going nowhere.
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3 comments:
Oh, hugs. Hugs and hugs, although I don't think you are the huggerly kind. Listen, I'm 20 minutes away. Say the word and we'll go have a cup of tea someplace.
It doesn't help to say that I think there's something going 'round.
And it can only be ugly when 30 year old family stuff comes to a head.
Still. Considered yourself hugged.
Thank you, Becs. Hug Gus for me.
I'm sorry that you're feeling so alone and don't have any one to confide in, Silk. This has been one strange, isolating year for so many, hasn't it? I hope you find a confidant soon so you can get it off your chest.
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