1287 Museum Complaints

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

If you aren't me, don't bother reading this. I just need to blow off steam.

Today I went to the museum. I needed to send membership cards to 24 people who had newly joined or renewed their membership last month.

Sounds simple.

Everybody gets a envelope of paper - a "thank you" letter, a "please consider volunteering" letter, a "membership levels and benefits" sheet, their personalized membership card, and a "matching grants reminder". That's the basic package.

However, there are like eight different levels of membership. Each of those different levels gets a different "premium", ranging from nothing through a window decal, or a lighthouse magnet, or river scene notecards, and on up to a copy of a book on river history. The mid-levels and up also get another membership card that gets them discounts in other museums.

Also, the "thank you" letter is different for new members from that sent to renewing members.

Oh, and a member can check "send no premium", in which case they get just the basic stuff for their level.

Now, let's see ---

That's 8(levels) x 2 (premium/no premium) x 2 (new/renewing) = 32 possible envelope stuffing permutations!

Which means very flippin' one of the envelopes has to be put together individually! And the computer printout that I work from doesn't say whether they are new or renewing, so I have to go back to the original hardcopy forms to figure that out.

Whoever decided what should be done had no thought about how it would have to be done.

Freakin' idiots.

It ought to be a standard packet for everyone. Period. Generalize the thank-you letter. As to the premiums, if they are necessary (which I question) I'd say include a coupon in each packet, and if they bring it in to the museum gift shop, they get their gift, or a discount on a purchase, value depending on their membership level.

This month was relatively easy because there were only 24 envelopes.

Can't wait for the next batch. That'll be about 50.

I think I'm going to have to come up with an argument and a presentation. I wish I knew to whom I should present it. That place has too many chiefs.
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