3255 Thoughts on stones and emotional reactions.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

"The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshiped anything but himself."
-- Sir Richard Francis Burton --

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Don't know that I agree with the green quote above, but it is interesting, especially coming from such an accomplished and experienced man. Worth thinking about, anyway.

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The hospital folks told me that the doctor would have the results of last Friday's tests on Monday, and I was anxious to find out what happens next. I called the doctor's office, and surprise, he's "out of the office until Thursday". Great. "The reports are on his desk, and he'll look at them Thursday."

So I'll wait until mid-afternoon today, and if he hasn't called by then, I'll call him.

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On the trembling Friday, after the IV trauma: There was another instance of the same kind of trembling, two years ago, at about this time of year. I received an email that I thought was from a close friend. Turns out it was a fake id made to look like it came from the friend. I never did find out who sent it, but perhaps they knew me well enough to know that I probably wouldn't open an email, and absolutely wouldn't follow a link in an email, unless I knew and trusted the sender.

Anyway, I opened it, followed the link in it, and got a huge emotional shock. It was so bad I couldn't stop shaking for almost an hour. My head shook so badly my eyes couldn't focus. Arms and hands couldn't grip. Legs couldn't support me. I think I have an idea of what the later stages of Parkinson's might feel like. It scared me because I couldn't control it, and I was afraid something had broken in my nervous system and maybe it would never stop, that maybe I'd had some kind of stroke. Or something. At least fear of what was happening to my body took my mind off the message I'd just received and gave me time to absorb it.

That's what happened to me after the IV trauma Friday. The same kind of trembling. So I think maybe the nurse was correct, that it wasn't the contrast, or the cold in the room, but an emotional reaction. The trembling two years ago had the same effect on my body, too, in that it completely wiped me out. It took me a few days to physically recover then, too.

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I had vowed two weeks ago that phlebotomists would henceforth listen to me, that they would try my hand before the arm, or I would walk out. I have since discovered that all along I had been using the wrong words - that talking mainly about the pain, the fire, the branding iron, doesn't work. That just gets "Oh, you won't feel this", especially from those who think they're experts, followed by the pain, the fire, the branding iron, and "Oh, you must have a lot of nerves there". Yeah, that's what I said.

What DOES work is the words "thin walls, collapse, blowout", all of which are also true. They actually listen to and think about that.

And now I have another vow. If I ever have to have anything involving both an IV and dehydration, I will go in and get the IV whatchmacallit installed THE DAY BEFORE!, when I can be fully hydrated. I'll have to talk to someone and find out if that's possible.

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I've been reading up on what causes kidney stones and how to prevent them. It depends on the composition of the stones, but for the most common types it seems like everything I eat is bad. Especially the diet the nutritionist put me on last year, that was working so well for me.

In my darker moments I want to blame the stones on the diet, but I don't really think that was the cause. I think it's that I've had an undiagnosed untreated kidney infection for at least the past year.

Oddly, people who live near large bodies of water and those who drink soft water are also more prone to kidney stones. No reason given, just apparently an observation, a statistical correlation. I have moved from high ground in the woods, a half mile from a river, with well water measuring 13 on a 0-15 scale of hardness, to low ground a half block from a saltwater bay, with city water so soft that I can't taste it and drying drops leave no mark. Hmmmm.

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I've got a new peeve.

I've been reading/hearing more and more often "one IN the same".

That makes no sense.

It's "one AND the same".

Another example of people not thinking about what they're saying.

Sheesh.