1154 Experts

Friday, March 9, 2007

Chris, over there at "Inane thoughts and insane ramblings", wrote about how "once a person deems themselves to have become an 'expert', he/she often assumes a position of arrogance", and what this sometimes (often!) leads to when it's in an online group.

Oh, my goodness yes! I've seen it. I haven't often been the recipient of flaming (although if I had written what I was actually thinking I might have been) because I usually lurk in new neighborhoods for a long time, finding out what the "rules" are, and who rules the roost, before I raise my head out of the foxhole. In most cases, once I get the lay of the land, I sneak out under cover of darkness and tiptoe away. It's a minefield out there.

In the past I have dropped in on online support groups and forums. There was a brain tumor forum, a long-term in-home caregiver forum, an Alzheimer's forum (when we were facing Jay's father's dementia), and a few bellydance forums, among others. In EVERY case, there was ONE person who seemed to be considered the doyen, the person who had all the answers, and who seemed to be constantly online. The expert.

They don't say "In my experience...", or "My opinion is...". It's always "This is so. Period." No, I'm not saying they have to qualify everything. You get it from the way they say it, they way they don't allow questioning or difference of opinion.

What's really weird is the way they acquire a following, sycophants, who worship the "expert", and will blister anyone who dares to contradict or question him or her.

When there's something I need to know about, I get into the research in a BIG way. A few days later, when I raise my head, I sometimes know more theory than professionals who have been in the field for years, because they know what they know, in the direction they're heading, but I now know what forty of their peers know, in multiple directions. And then I'm ready to talk with people with actual experience, to glean more, to ask about the conflicts and inconsistencies and holes and how it works "in the trenches" with real people, who are the real experts. Which is what got me to the forums.

Big mistake.

The Alzheimer's forum I visited was populated mostly by people who were lost and desperate for guidance. There was one woman who was obviously "The Expert", who doled out advice on everything. She was online 18 hours a day. She was often wrong. But woe be to any newcomer who questioned her pronouncements, "... but the doctor said...". The vicious wrath of her sycophants would descend. They'd point out her enormous experience in this area, her selfless willingness to be helpful.

No one was allowed to insult her by questioning her experience. She claimed to be the sole caregiver for her husband, who was in an advanced stage, with combativeness and wandering and incontinence - so howcum her sycophants didn't question her constant presence online? Especially when they themselves were doing the same thing for a loved one, and they could manage only a few minutes a day online? Is her husband tied to a chair all day?

I couldn't resist. I did question it. I retreated with my tail on fire.

I felt so sorry for those people who really did need expert help. Instead they got the pronouncement of some woman who just wanted to be the doyen, and got it simply by being the loudest and most constant voice. I suspect the Alzheimer's doyen had little or no direct experience with Alzheimer's, but was able to take over the forum simply by being able to be there full time. When you have an answer for every question, there are people out there who will think you're so wonderfully helpful, even though half your answers are bull poopy.

Chris commented on the arrogance of the "expert". I am amazed at the blind devotion of the sycophants.

I've noticed a similar phenomenon with "personal" bloggers whose life is a self-generated disaster. They attract a coterie of admirers who praise and flatter, believe the wildest stories and excuses, and will viciously attack any commenter who asks "Um, have you considered losing weight / getting a job / less partying more studying?" (Yeah, I admit I'm attracted to blogs that look like slow-motion train wrecks, but I don't praise the engineer.)

I don't understand.

(By the way, if you read Chis's piece, you'll notice a difference in our styles. He tends to be philosophical and objective. He's outside looking in. I get down dirty and personal. I'm inside fighting out.)
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