If you're not careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed
and loving the people who are doing the oppressing.
-- Malcom X --
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The movie Gaslight (1944) was mentioned today. I'd never seen it, so I looked it up and the reviews made me want to see it. I found the entire movie several places online, but always in Spanish, with no closed captioning. Duh? So I ordered it from Amazon.
Searching for "gaslight" turned up several references to "gaslighting" as pertains to domestic/relationship abuse. I'd never hear the term in that context before. That exploration led me to http://www.abuseandrelationships.org/index.html, a very interesting site.
When we think of abuse in a relationship, we tend to think of battering, or the threat of violence, or coercion. But there are other much more subtle forms of abuse.
I read all of the section "The 'Con'". It was eye-opening. I didn't realize that some of the relationships I've been in were abusive. But now that I think about it, yeah. I recognize it.
Not only that, but in at least one relationship, *I* was abusive. Once I wanted out, I was derisive, showed a lack of respect, and purposely undermined his confidence. This is abuse.
I intend to read all of the rest of that website.
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3 comments:
Boy, my boss uses all the techiniques under Subtle Forms.
Expert manipulators are often bosses. That's how they got there.
I'm sorry to say that I recognize myself in some of these. I also see my mother and ex-husband in even more.
Why can't the world be kinder and less complicated?
Oh. Because that would be spoiling some jerkwad's fun.
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