3505 Amuse, Annoy

Monday, April 9, 2012

To know and not to do is not to know.
-- Wang Yang Ming --

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Wow. Ten days since my last post. I'm really slowing down here. No reason, just lazy, I think.

Things that have amused me:

An envelope arrived in the mail today with "SECURED DOCUMENT", "OFFICIAL CORRESPONDENCE", and "PERSONAL & CONFIDENTIAL" in bold emblazoned across the front, above and below the address printed inside the gray block designed to prevent peeking through the envelope, between the tear strips designed to prevent opening and resealing the envelope. Super important looking. Addressed to [my name] or current resident.

I figure it's actually for the house, not me, so I won't open it.

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Remember the "Nova" automobile, and how it generated laughs because in Spanish, it means "No Go"? Well, there's a line of haircare products named "Wen". I guess whoever named it doesn't know what a wen is.

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Today I overhead someone telling another person to calm down and shut up. She said, "Turn your off button on."

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I found this chart showing the relative depth of lakes and ocean trenches, and how deep various animals and submersibles can go: http://xkcd.com/1040/. Click on the chart to enlarge it so you can read the labels. I am amazed that sperm whales and turtles need to breathe air, so how can they go so deep? They must come up fast!

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If you ever get tired of watching tv or movies, check out Sylvester the talking cat, and his housemates Gibson the kitten and Shelby the lab. It's a series of videos made by Steve Cash. I don't know how he does it, but it works. There is a storyline, so you have to watch them in order. Http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjZrUn03kXI&list=PLF72C3E0A45E3093C&feature=plcp&context=C4a675a8FDvjVQa1PpcFOUgM8mImL-ITjxBDHZRFQyhuzGn_csuKo= will get you the playlist. Just let it go and they'll play in order.

At one point, Steve asks Sylvester to teach the kitten to talk. Sylvester teaches Gibson only two words: "Help!" and "Todd". Steve wonders who Todd is, it's driving him crazy, but Sylvester won't tell him. Warning - Sylvester swears a lot, to the point where Shelby the lab starts to think "Bitch" is her (Shelby's) name.

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I read this headline, "Giant, feathered dinosaur remains discovered in China", and for many moments I thought, "Well of course. When you discover something, it does tend to remain discovered."

Told ya I tend to read literally.

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This video is for The Queen. My sister sent the link to me.


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I took statistics courses three, maybe four, times, and I still don't understand it. Makes no sense to me. I always thought the course should have been titled "How To Make Any Set of Numbers Mean Anything You Want Them To". However, I still know the difference between correlation and causation. So statements in "news" articles like "Another reason to floss every day: New York University researchers found that people who floss infrequently are three times more likely to develop stomach cancer" make my head hurt.

And I bet people who wear baggy shorts are three times more likely to get the ball through the hoop than are people who wear argyle socks.

The latest perversion was today, when I heard that the autism rate is rising, and the number of women who are overweight when they are pregnant is rising, therefore obesity during pregnancy causes autism.

Duh? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. That is an extremely loose correlation, not evidence of causation. "Helicopter parenting" is on the rise too, so is that also a cause?

It might make more sense if they tracked the children of women of various weights, and then they'd have to look at other factors common to women in various weight groups. I hate when sloppy "scientists" make things sound so simple.

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Like Girl Scout cookies? Check out this: http://lifehacker.com/5898791/get-your-girl-scout-cookie-fix-all-year-round-with-these-grocery-store-equivalents.

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Explore! Go to http://maps.google.com/, and search for "Ulan Bator, Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia", and then click on the satellite view. Fascinating, eh? The main drag is Ghengis Khan Avenue, N-S. Note that many of the homes are walled, and have some kind of round structure in the yard. I'm wondering if they are yurts, or water tanks.

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I signed up for the local township government newsletter email. Stuff like board meeting minutes, activities, news, police blotters, and so on. The top part has either a link to a topic or a short announcement, followed by boilerplate.

Received last month:
Top part - NOTICE TO ALL RESIDENTS - [xxxx] Township Water Department will discontinue service for unpaid utility bills as of March 5th, 2012.

Boilerplate - We hope you enjoy this Township e-Bulletin for residents.

I laughed.

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I'm literal, remember? You really don't want to know the mental image I get when someone (using the wrong word!) describes something as "heart rendering".
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