3411 Joke 1

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Don't worry about people stealing your idea. If it's original,
you'll have to ram it down their throats.
-- Howard Aiken --

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? It depends on the breed.

• Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?
• Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I?
• Border Collie: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
• Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp!
• Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it.By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
• Rottweiler: Go Ahead! Make me!
• Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Let the servants. . . .
• Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
• Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
• Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.
• Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.
• Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAP
• Keeshund: (Stands with furrowed brow for several minutes, then wanders off having forgotten what the problem was.)
  
• Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
• Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there... there... there... see?
  
• Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
• Australian Kelpie: First I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
• Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?
  

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