2688 Miss not

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

A family is only as sick as its secrets.

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I have a learning disability. Once upon a time they called it dyslexia, but I think it actually is a left-right confusion thing. Anyway, a related problem is that I take things literally. Most people, when they hear a word used incorrectly, or a bad sentence construction, glide right over it and understand what is meant. I don't. I understand what was said, and am often confused.

More and more lately I'm hearing people say, "I miss not [something]" when what they really mean is "I miss [something]."

If someone whom I had not seen in a while said to me, "Oh, I've missed not seeing you!", I am initially insulted, and want to leave so they can get back to not seeing me, which they obviously prefer.

I've heard that construction five or six times in the past 24 hours, and it's starting to piss me off. Barbara Walters just said it on "The View" a few minutes ago, that the Gosslin kids "miss not having the photographers around", and I yelled at the TV, because I don't know what she's saying! That the photographers aren't around now and the kids miss them? Or what she actually said, that photographers are around, and the kids would prefer that they not be there?

I really don't know.

Accepting poor construction leads to misunderstanding and confusion. For example, suppose there's a coworker I don't like, and I've been happy to not have to see him every day, but then we get assigned to a project, and I have to see him every day, and that distresses me. I could properly say that I miss not seeing him. People will misunderstand and think I like seeing him, when what I really mean (and said) is that I miss not seeing him.

Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

I'd advise people to avoid "not" with "miss", but sometimes that's exactly what you mean, but you can't use it even if that is what you mean, because if you do, people will interpret it the other way anyway.
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