#669

I tried defragmenting again. This time I closed everything but Explorer. "Ctrl/Alt/Delete" says only Explorer was running when I started the defragment job. Twelve hours later, it was still only 10% complete. It kept restarting again, claiming that the disk contents had changed. I give up. ("It USED to work!", she whines....)
I don't understand.

----------------------------------------

I was awakened this morning at 6:30 am by men stomping around on my roof. At about 6:50, an enormous truck arrived with the shingles. It used a crane to lift the pallets of shingles onto the roof, incidentally taking out a few tree branches and squashing driveway surface on the way.

The roofer had some bad news for me -- a tree branch was touching the roof in the back of the garage, and some carpenter ants had used it as a highway. They made a huge hole in the soffit. He said "I cleaned the nest out - got'em all I think." And he cut the branch down. Hmmmm. I think I'll talk to an exterminator pretty soon. Sigh. I really don't need more of this.

----------------------------------------

I delivered four bags of bubble wrap to a woman in Kingston this morning, and stowed three more bags in the van to go to the Elmendorph Inn Resale Shop when they open on Wednesday. On the way back from the woman's house, I stopped at the Salvation Army store to find out when I can donate stuff such that I can get a receipt. Then this afternoon I made a list and packed up Jay's sports coats and shirts that had been stored in the basement in movers' wardrobe boxes, ever since he'd moved here from Texas, and put them in the van to donate tomorrow or Wednesday.

There are three sports coats - one ordinary, one raw silk with leather elbow patches, and one hand-woven, hand-tailored in England, genuine Harris Tweed. All three had never been worn, still had the tags on them. When Jay was with his ex-wife, he used a special deodorant that left waxy deposits under the arms of his shirts, so it was easy to tell which shirts had been worn, and which had never been worn. I discarded the shirts with deposits. That left more than 35 never-worn shirts, about 3/4 are dress shirts. Do you believe it? I also added four windbreakers, all in excellent, possibly never-worn, condition.

While sorting out the windbreakers, I found Jay's old fraternity jacket (Pi Kappa Alpha, Carnegie Mellon). That one will go into a container of Jay's things that I can't bring myself to get rid of. I checked the pockets. There was a Kleenex in one pocket, and a Mars bar wrapper in the other. I had to sit down for a moment. Kleenex and chocolate wrappers were so very characteristic of Jay. He left trails of them everywhere.

This evening I will cut the buttons off the 15 or so discard shirts. For me, that's fun.

#668 Artsy Daughter

Back in early March, Roman and I had gone to a weekend Mensa regional gathering in New Jersey. Daughter joined us for Saturday evening. One of the activities that Daughter attended was a 1-hour painting workshop. After the talk, the attendees were instructed to paint a portrait of the person sitting at the table opposite them. Well, Daughter arrived at the room late, missed much of the talk, and was left with the rejects of the brushes.

The above is the painting she did of John, who sat opposite her. To fully appreciate this portrait, you need to know four things. 1) John was not sitting still. He was painting her at the same time. 2) The entire portrait is 4 inches high and 2.5 inches wide. 3) The brush Daughter used was one full inch wide! She painted using the corners of the brush. 4) John is immediately recognizable.

I think it's incredible.

This John guy was very interesting. A wee tad young for me, but interesting. I smelled testosterone. If I hadn't been there with Roman, I'd have flirted, and I don't know how to flirt, but I'd have tried. Daughter got his card, and I told her to hang onto it, I might want it later.

She discarded it.

I could kill her.

I'm KEEPING the painting! So there!

#667 Tooky Made Me Do It

You've heard of him. I couldn't resist him. I've dreamed of him. And here he is. I present -- TOOKY!




These are not photographs - they're from a flatbed scanner, so yeah, they're washed out, but hey! I think it worked pretty well, considering.

From the back of his head to the front of his teeth, he's 5 inches, from the top of his brow to under his chin he's 3.75 inches, and cheek to cheek across his grin he's 3 inches. He's got a lot of personality.

#666 The Devil Made Me Do It

Revelation 13:18. Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is six hundred threescore and six.

For anyone who doesn't know, 666, "the number of the beast", does not represent Satan, or any version of Satan. It represented a real person known to the author.

The ancient Romans, Greeks, and Jews often used letters of the alphabet to represent numbers. And words or names made up of these letters would have numerical value (today's version is numerology). Isaac Asimov, in Asimov's Guide to the Bible, explains that the writer of Revelation was apparently afraid to mention the name of the man he castigates, for fear perhaps of a charge of treason, so he refers to the man by the number his name represents. The person Isaac says most commentators mention as most likely is Neron Caesar (Greek version of Nero). Isaac likes Domitian better - a ruler who was in power at the time Revelation was written, and who heavily persecuted Christians. (Note - the "Antichrist'" means one who is against (anti) Christians.)

Just thought I'd best not write anything with this entry number that folks might misinterpret.

(And yes, I can refer to him as Isaac. I knew him personally. He thought I had "a great pair". As usual, he was right.)

#665 Tooky Dream

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Last Saturday, at the flea market, I had bought a hiking stick made from a hardwood sapling (mentioned in the April 22 entry). The top of the stick is the root knot which has been fashioned into an ugly beasty with googly eyes and a mouthful of real deer teeth. The guy who made it said its name is "Tooky".

The stick is almost 6 feet tall and the root knot is heavy, so to balance it for my grip, I'm going to have to shorten the stick by about a foot, so that when I hold it just below Tooky's head, my hand will be just below my shoulder level. I want to take it with me to Ricketts Glen.

Last night I had the strangest dream. I dreamt that Jay decided to shorten Tooky for me, but he didn't talk to me about it first. He came up from the basement with the stick, all pleased with what he'd done. He had cut too much off. He had shortened it to medical cane length -- Tooky's head was at hip level on me. I got very upset. No so much angry as frantic to think of some way to fix it, to make it long again. I ran through all the possibilities in my mind, glue, pegs, wrapped splints, added pipe, and as I had to reject each possibility as ugly or not strong enough, I got more and more upset. I awoke exactly at 3 am, in a panic, gasping for breath.

The big thing about Tooky is that he is absolutely unique. He's so ugly he's cute. There isn't and won't ever be another exactly like him.

I feel almost like it was a message. In life, Jay would never have done anything like that. He would absolutely have confirmed the length with me. So his having done something so uncharacteristic seems significant. Why does my mind have Jay doing it, as opposed to MY cutting it too short by mistake? Something else that strikes me is that, in my experience, Roman almost always wakes up and goes to the bathroom, or the kitchen for water, or gets on the computer, at 3 am. I don't see the connection, but I have a strong feeling it's there.

The dream must mean something. When I was driving to the grocery store this morning, I found myself still trying to find some way to fix Tooky (who, by the way, is still uncut and still tall, and doesn't need fixing). Whatever the REAL problem is, it's still there and unresolved.

#664 Nails

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Ok, Daughter, gotta tap into your education - what makes a light fixture kill bulbs? I'm getting tired of feeding the ceiling fixture in the den. These lights are on no more than some other lights elsewhere in the house, but the bulbs will burn out literally within a month. The fixture has three positionable metal "cans" that hang down (they look just like the cans on the old '70s pole lamps), and I put 60 watt bulbs in them. The first bulb will die within three or four weeks, and the third to die will usually go within 10 weeks. Do they get too hot or something? I'm thinking I may have to replace the fixture. This is ridiculous.

The roofers have been here, and have stripped the front half of the roof, and have applied some kind of tar paper-looking stuff, and the new shingles will be delivered Monday. I mentioned to the head honcho that I was worried about nails on the driveway, and he said no problem, they will clean up "real well." I asked if they use a magnet, and he said yes and showed me one on the side of the tool box.

After they left, I went out and patrolled the driveway myself. I picked up twelve nails and eight huge staples. Just lying there. Glinting in the sun. Right where I turn around and park.

The van is staying on the grass, 30 feet from the house, until they're completely finished!

I went to the grocery store today, and ran into Piper there. I was buying stuff to make spaghetti and meat balls, and Piper talked me into buying a special type of cheese to grate on top. It was very expensive, but he said it was worth it. Only later did the irony strike me -- my financial advisor urging me to buy cheese at $14 a pound.

#663 Love & Sex

Friday, April 28, 2006

I've been occasionally answering questions in here from The Book of Questions, by Gregory Stock, Ph.D.,Workman Publishing Company, Inc., and I had mentioned it to Roman, the context being that many of the questions seemed to apply to what he and I were going through at the moment I read them. I believe in coincidence as sometimes being meaningful. Someone had given him a similar book, The Book of Questions - Love & Sex, by the same author, and last Wednesday, Roman gave it to me.

I opened the book randomly, and read the first question I saw at the top of the page, and I said a bad word. He glanced over, raised eyebrows, and I showed him the question. We both burst into laughter.

The question was, "#83 Have you ever had a lover you wanted to break up with but keep as a friend? or perhaps as a casual sex partner?"

And he doesn't believe in coincidence. Pish!

---------------------------------

Fishkill called this evening, and we talked for about 40 minutes. He's busy tomorrow, and I'm not sure of my schedule this weekend (the roofers) so he's going to call again Sunday morning, and we'll get together, coffee and conversation, maybe lunch, sometime, somewhere, on Sunday.

#662 Painting

Friday, April 28, 2006

I went to the Maritime Museum today, and painted the end wall at the top of the stairs. I like painting walls.

The stepladder was scary. I guess it was safe, but it felt pretty wobbly, and I was standing on it at the top of a long flight of stairs, with a glass-paneled door on the side. My right thumb was pretty useless, because the very first thing I had done was run my thumb over the wood trim, and I got a huge splinter -- bled all over the place for a few minutes.

After I stopped bleeding, I washed the wall, then I taped all around the edges, spackled the holes and where the old paint had peeled, and sanded the spackled spots and the various lumps, bumps, and uneven areas. This all took longer than it should have, because I had to search the work and storage areas to find all the tools and materials I needed. I ended up applying the spackle with an artist's palette knife, but it actually was the perfect implement for small holes.

All that took about an hour and a half for a 10'x12' wall. But the more effort you put into prep, the faster the actual painting will go, and the better it will look in the end.

Then I looked at the paint. The paint Russ had told me to use last Tuesday wasn't exactly the same color as the other walls, but he figured it was close enough (a medium light blue). But when I held the lid, that had some dried paint on it, up to the wall, it looked like it would clash badly with the trim color (medium blue). Unfortunately, Russ and the other staff people had made a run to Staples, so I had to wait for them to come back. I'm not going to paint the wall without final approval on the color.

Russ agreed that the original color choice wouldn't work, and we ended up going with a cream. The actual painting didn't take long at all. Russ said that he appreciated my efforts to do a good job. "Most of the people we get to help just slap it up", which was pretty obvious from the different layers of paint smeared on the adjoining paneled wall and the trim.

It looks good. Looks like a new wall -- not easy in such an old building. And oddly, the cream blends well with the blue on the other walls. You almost don't notice it's a different color. It brightens the badly-lit stairwell.

I must have made 15 trips up and down the stairs (higher ceilings downstairs - long flight), most of those trips carrying stuff, including the stepladder, to and from the workshop at the very back corner of the building, so I don't feel bad about not "exercising" today. I hadn't taken anything to drink, and nobody offered anything, and by 5 pm I thought I'd die of thirst. Lesson learned.

I needed to get gas on the way home, and stop at the grocery store for my every-other-Friday case of yogurt, but there was an accident on the bridge access road, so traffic was terrible. When I finally got to the gas station, cars were lined up into the street. I had to go around another way to get past, which brought me out north of the grocery store, ... and I gave up and went home. I'll get gas and yogurt tomorrow.

Frankly, I'm beat.

#661 Piper Lunch, Van Return

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Dinner last night with Mensa, stayed over at Roman's. Lunch today with Piper and Vinnie. Catching up on blog-reading this afternoon. Maybe trivia tonight, maybe not, haven't decided yet. Still tired from last night.

I returned the rental car and picked up the van today. As of 3 pm second-choice garage still hadn't found out how they wanted to handle the warranty on the sensor, but I later got a call from them, they are willing to replace the sensor completely free of charge, NO labor cost. Whoop! I don't know how, but I won. Both first-choice garage and second-choice garage had said that I wouldn't get free labor no matter who replaced it, that labor is not covered by the warranty.

Second-choice garage will do it next Wednesday. So until then, I'll be driving the van with the "check engine" light on, but it shouldn't be a problem.

I hope.

#660 Quick Entry

The day got away from me again. I overslept a bit, then was awakened by the delivery of a BIG construction dumpster - they'll start stripping the roof on Saturday. I rushed into town because (again) I thought today was Thursday, and I had to meet Piper for lunch, but he wasn't in his office because (surprise!) today isn't Thursday.

So I went to the machines and exercised, got some few things cleaned up around the house, and now I have to shower again for dinner in LaGrange tonight. I doubt that I will have time to update until tomorrow. But, lunch with Piper tomorrow, maybe trivia with Tom tomorrow evening. Painting a wall at the museum Friday afternoon, so I'll probably spend some time Friday visiting galleries on the Rondout.

I don't know what's going on with the van. Don hasn't called, and I figure no news is good news.

There are FOUR bird's nests on or near the front porch. The pair of finches on the north light fixture, cardinals on the top of the south light, an unidentified pair on the bottom of the south light, and another unidentified pair in the shrub right next to the steps/ramp. All the nests have eggs, three in each. Roman fixed the switch last night so I can turn the porch lights on, but -- now I can't turn them on until the baby birds are out of the nests. I don't like not having a light, but I love having the birds, so it evens out.... But I'm going to get the wire up to foil nesting before the second round of egg-laying starts in mid-summer!

#659 Van, Volunteer, Dinner

Yeah, a dud title, but it's to help me find entries, not to attract you!

Back in February, I had to have a sensor in the van replaced, and because it was a Saturday, I had the work done at my second-choice shop. So when the "check engine" light went on again last Thursday, I took the van to my first-choice shop (right next door to the second-choice). Guess what? It's the same sensor. And it's not anything wrong with the engine - it's definitely the sensor. So I spent some time today going back and forth between the two shops, because the sensor is still under the supplier's warranty, but I want the first-choice shop to do the replacement, not the second-choice shop. As of 5 pm, the issue of who gets what refund how and from whom was still unresolved. And I'm still driving the rental car.

I went over to the Maritime Museum this afternoon to meet the people and see what they have for me to do. There were no times available in the gift shop that worked for me, so I'm going to be working on maintenance. I get to paint an interior wall this Friday! (And, as Roman pointed out, that leaves the gift shop for "the little old ladies", which is just as well.) So today I got the tour and found out where the tools and supplies are, and so on.

Roman tutored Peter this afternoon, after which he came here and I cooked us dinner while he replaced the light switch in the foyer, and the batteries in the kitchen phone, then tested all the old batteries around here. Some of the batteries had "use by" dates of like 1998! Odd, but the date on the batteries had only a casual relationship to the tested strength.

Man, I'm rusty in the kitchen! I've cooked twice in the past four months, and neither meal came out as well as I'd hoped. At least this one was edible. The salad was actually pretty good.

I sent him home at 9, I was pretty tired. But I'll see him again tomorrow night. There's a Mensa dinner at a Cuban restaurant near his home, so I'll meet him at his house and we'll go together.

On other fronts, Fishkill sent an email today, says he'll call "soon", now that the project he'd been concentrating on is over. And there's a guy in Pleasant Valley that I'd been e-corresponding with over the past two weeks who sounded very interesting -- I was about ready to suggest that we meet -- until his email today, wherein he divulged that six years ago he "became a full gospel Pentecostal Christian". Oops. I see a potential for major friction. What had tripped the balance with Dreyfuss last week was his announcement that he was looking for an evangelical church to attend. My dating site profile says that "I eschew organized religion". Roman, after he stopped laughing, suggested that I might want to use a word everyone understands.

Bedtime. G'night.

#658 The Medieval Archetype Test

Lover I'm not telling your actual score. Hmph!

The Lover (or Poet) is a rare type. (S)He has a rather contradictory nature. He is completely unselfish and generally regards others above himself, yet somehow in his effort to please, often ends up doing things that appear completely self-centered. The Lover loves people and strives for acceptance, but at the same time withdraws from the world. Lovers are authors, artists, philosophers, and musicians. They live unorthodox, unconventional, or even chaotic lives. Lovers experience the highest highs and lowest lows. The Lover's complement is the hardened, unhesitant Warrior.

Link: The Medieval Archetype Test written by isayso on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

#657 Peanut Rebound

Monday, April 24, 2006

Remember the 6 30-gallon bags of plastic peanuts I delivered to Spackenkill Road (almost an hour away) last Thursday, when I tore up the bottom of the van on the woman's driveway?

Guess what I found on the ecycle list today.

OFFERED - 6 30-gal bags of plastic peanuts - Spackenkill Road

Must pick up TODAY by 5pm. Town of Poughkeepsie, off Spackenkill Road.
I got them from another ecycler, but can't use them; there are just too
many! The bags are huge, so please bring mini van or p/u truck that
will hold them.

Duh? Yup. That's her. I recognized the email address. There were lots of people closer, with decent driveways, to whom I could have given them. But she wanted them, and she was first in. And now not only is she reoffering them, but she's apparently not keeping any? She can't use them because there are "too many"? Duh?

I don't understand.

From now on I don't deliver.

#656 Volunteer Assignment

I went to the RSVP (Retired and Senior Volunteer Program) meeting this morning, and I got my assignment.

RSVP takes in requests for volunteers from all kinds of programs and not-for-profit organizations, and then farms volunteers out wherever needed. The woman asked me what I'd like to do, where I'd like to go (and I couldn't say "Wherever I'm most likely to meet healthy active 57-63 year-old men"), so I said the northeastern part of the county, and I'm shy and not very good at conversation (true), so visiting nursing homes and shut-ins probably isn't the best for me.

So, I have been assigned to the Hudson River Maritime Museum, on the Rondout. This may be ideal for me! She also said that the allover average for the RSVP volunteers is 2 to 4 hours a week. I can certainly do that, and still have time left over for Habitat for Humanity. I'd sorta like to do some respite care for Hospice, too, just a few hours a week. I remember how much I appreciated that when Jay was sick, but I think I'll wait a bit and see how this works out.

I have to be careful not to overcommit. Last time I did that, I figured that since I was working 40 hours a week for free, I may as well get paid, and I went back to work full time. Don't want to get back into that thinking....

I was surprised at the other volunteers at the meeting. They were all a lot older than me, and many of them were rather frail looking. Some will be assigned to drive people to medical appointments and on errands. That's a bit scary.

#655 What's My Major?

You scored as Mathematics. You should be a Math major! Like Pythagoras, you are analytical, rational, and are always ready to tackle the problem head-on! Mathematics 100% Psychology 92% English 92% Engineering 83% Philosophy 58% Linguistics 58% Journalism 58% Sociology 42% Dance 33% Theater 33% Art 33% Biology 25% Chemistry 25% Anthropology 17% What is your Perfect Major? (PLEASE RATE ME!!<3) created with QuizFarm.

Ahah! I did major in math, with an English minor. Psychology was (and still is) a major interest, but not much was offered in the only school I could afford to go to. Oddly, I'm actually not much interested in math, or in writing. I'm more interested in analysis and synthesis, and in reading. In other words, just dabbling. I wonder what that means. (Probably means I'm lazy.)

#654 Sunday Defrag

Busy day today. It's pouring out, so I can't take stuff down to the basement, but I at least moved more containers to nearer the door and dusted off more shelf space in the basement.

I called the Hunk about the chimney work, watered the plants, made the hotel reservation for the trip to Ricketts Glen, took the van to the service station, dropped off the key with a note about what's wrong, picked up the rental car, and paid some bills. All I need to do now is wash my hair.

Last night, about 10 pm, I started a defragmenting run on the PC, and as of about 5 pm today it still wasn't finished. It says the "drive's content has changed: restarting..." about every 90 seconds. I had stopped everything except "creative launcher", "explorer", "rundll", and "systray". I don't really know what those things ARE, but either they won't or can't go away when I say "end task" on ctrl/alt/delete, so whatever they do, there's no way to stop them.

I finally gave up and called Hercules, and he said it might be my virus scanner waking up every so often. I finally just gave up on it. I'd really like to figure it out, though. This dog is getting slower and slower.

Roman called this evening, and he agreed it's probably the virus scanner. That, or a virus. Gack! And he says I should be able to stop "rundll", and that "creative launcher" must be something Jay added. Jay "improved" and recoded a lot of standard stuff on this machine, which is one of the biggest problems in maintaining it. A lot of it is nonstandard, and you don't know what until you run right into it.

I was shuffling through some old CDs this afternoon, and I found the backups Jay had made when he first installed this Windows 98 SE. There was also a disk labeled "Drives C and D Backup", AND one labeled "Drives E and F Backup".

E and F?

C and D are hard disks, but "My Computer" doesn't know anything about E or F. Roman says that Jay had obviously partitioned the hard disk (hence C and D), and it's possible that E and F are "hidden" partitions - which would explain why Jay had told me we had xx gigabytes of hard drive, but when I ask the computer how much we have, it shows a lot less. It would be interesting to find out what's on that E and F backup CD.

Roman says there is usually a way to make the hidden disks available by hitting a particular key (possibly a function key) on IPL, but there's no way to know what key, and there's probably a partitioning program around that I maybe could get to E and F through, but it's one of those things you don't touch unless you know exactly what you're doing.

Yeah, every once in a while I see that program, and so far I have resisted playing with it.

(I haven't seen anything associated with the AAVIT partnership on the visible disks, so I'll bet that's where it all is. And probably IBM stuff from when he was working from home. That doesn't seem to exist anywhere else, either.)

Oh, well. I am going to buy a new machine sometime soon. After I get the den cleaned out, I think. I guess I can limp along until then....

#653 Robbed!

I went to the flea market at the fair grounds today (free parking and free entry, by the way). It was HUGE!! as promised. There were vendors in all five buildings, plus tents outside around the buildings. Lots and lots of stuff, some new, some old, and all of it really cheap. I hadn't intended to buy anything - I'm mainly in throwing-out mode these days - but it was only 41 degrees at noon and raining steadily, and after two weeks of high 60s/low 70s, I wasn't dressed warmly enough. One of the first booths I passed was selling sweatshirts for $3, so I bought a really nice fuzzy gray one.

I walked around checking prices on items similar to things I have and want to get rid of, and admiring the crafty things. Despite my promise, I did buy something - a carved walking stick. The guy finds oddly shaped sticks/branches, and fashions them into fantasy animals. I bought a beasty with googly eyes and a mouthful of real deer teeth.

Because of the rain, it was very crowded. You had to weave in and out of clumps of people. I had my cash, folded, in a half-zipped pocket in my purse. The purse was in a large tote bag over my shoulder. I had peeled off $3 to pay for the sweatshirt, and $20 for the stick (inside the purse - I never actually took the wad out) and then I got hungry. At the food booth, I discovered that I had no money. There had been somewhere between $85 and $120 in there. I searched the purse and the tote bag, and it was gone. A pickpocket? I figure that'll teach me. If I had bought everything I wanted, at least now I'd have something to show for the money!

After the fair, I picked up the keys for the rental car (I'll drop off the van and switch to the rental tomorrow), and then met the roofers here and signed the contracts for the roof and the exhaust fan. Now we need a week's worth of dry weather.

-------------------------------

Nightline did a bit on rising gasoline prices last night. They laid the blame mainly on two factors. There's a law that requires that refineries add MTBE (ethanol?)(Later correction - see explanation at bottom of entry), and few refineries are currently set up to do it, which is causing an artificial shortage. China and India have increased their energy demands over the past few years, which puts more pressure on the supply, and therefore increases the price. I would add drivers of SUVs and Hummers (which Nightline mentioned but not so much as a cause, more as victims, who don't care because they are willing to pay it), and something that no one ever mentions - the building of all those superhighways and the increased power of the trucking companies, both of which led to the demise of the railroads and mass transit. A news program today pointed out the huge profits of the oil companies, and included a clip of GWB promising to look into gouging.

(Is it gouging when a company charges what other companies charge, everywhere? Is it gouging when we still pay about half what Europe pays? Is it gouging when pharmaceutical companies charge what the market will bear for cancer drugs? If US oil companies charged too little for the gasoline, then what's to stop other countries from buying it out from under us and taking it on home, causing a major domestic shortage? If I were France, I would! At what point does capitalism turn into gouging? Just a question -- no point intended.)

It bothers me that the perceived high price of gas increases anger toward middle eastern countries, when the US gets only about 15% of our crude from the middle east. Middle Eastern oil goes mainly to Europe and Asia. We get ours mostly from North, Central, and South America and a few other African countries, who, of course, charge as much as they can get away with. No altruism.

(Later edit - That didn't sound right, because I remembered that MTBE is a groundwater polluter, something I was worried about when Daughter was living in the middle of what amounted to an automobile junkyard, drinking and showering from a well. So I looked it up. The requirement is that refineries move away from MTBE and switch to ethanol. Since some localities will no longer allow the sale of gasoline with MTBE, and refineries are slow making the switch, the demand for gasoline with ethanol exceeds the supply. MTBE and ethanol both combat air pollution.)

#652 Ricketts Glen Plans

I am going to Ricketts Glen the weekend of May 20. Let me know if anyone would like to join me.

#651 More Great Photos From Egypt

A Nation for All - http://www.bloglines.com/preview?siteid=5222683&itemid=27

#650 Thursday, Sick Van Again, and Friday

Friday, April 21, 2006

Well, well. No entry yesterday again. Maybe Mother IS losing it!

After Wednesday's entry, things got complicated. Roman was supposed to meet with Piper Wednesday afternoon, after which Roman and I would have dinner and a movie or something. Roman called during his lunch break to finalize, and I noticed that there was a message on my machine (I had been working in the basement and must have missed a call.) So after Roman hung up, I checked the message, and it was Piper - he had a plumbing problem at home, and wouldn't be able to meet with Roman, but was unable to contact him to cancel. I didn't have Roman's work number either. There ensued a few rounds of three-way phone tag, plus a trip into the village to put a note on Piper's office door, telling Roman to just come here when he arrived.

That ate up the afternoon. When I was finally able to catch Roman at his home, I asked if he still wanted to come to see me, and he said "Yes", which was nice, but then he added "I know the consequences if I don't." Which set the tone for the evening. Which was not good. Civil, but uncomfortable. And rather negative.

Then came Thursday.

I had listed 6 large bags of plastic packing peanuts late Wednesday on that Ecycle website I mentioned, and within seconds, a woman in Poughkeepsie had claimed them. I awoke yesterday to 20+ emails from other people wanting them. I started responding to the emails that they were gone, when it occurred to me that I should make sure this woman was going to take all of them before I discarded these offers, so I called her. I had offered in the ad to deliver, so she asked me to bring them to Pok at 3 that afternoon.

I screwed up.

Somehow, I had it stuck in my mind that "today" was Wednesday, not Thursday. I don't know why, but I've been doing that a lot lately. I was supposed to have lunch with Piper on Thursday, but, thinking it was Wednesday, I accidentally stood him up.

I didn't shower before leaving the house, and I was wearing "second-wearing" clothes, because I wanted to go to the exercise machines on the way to deliver the peanuts. Which I did. I worked the machines from 1 'til 2, and delivered the peanuts to Spackenkill Road at 3. The woman had a lip at the end of her driveway, and when I pulled in, and again when I pulled out, I scraped bottom badly (that low clearance on the van). Which sometimes isn't serious, but I got partway up Spackenkill, heading out on the almost-an-hour drive home, when a) the guy on the radio mention that today was Thursday (WHAT!!??), and b) the "check engine" light went on.

I had committed to go to the Third Thursday dinner, because Roman had to work that night, and he had given me the coupons. It's now about 3:30. I'd get home at 4:30ish, and have to leave at 5:15ish to come back to Pok for the dinner, and that's a lot of driving on a questionable van. I don't know what I may have torn loose. I couldn't like hang out at the mall and then go to dinner, because I stank, and I had no makeup on. I could either get the van looked at, or get me cleaned up, but not both. It was all suddenly too much for me to handle. I was ready to cry. I called Roman, who lives only about 10 minutes from where I was.

He was wonderful. We looked under the van. The only thing we saw was that it's dripping transmission fluid again. Everything else looked ok. He said it was probably ok to drive, but I should get it checked. And I could shower at his place and just chill until time to go to the dinner. I have an overnight case there, so it worked out. (He said my clothes didn't smell. Thank goodness I wear loose stuff.)

There were only three of us at the dinner. Tom and I were the first to arrive, and we decided that if no one else showed up, we'd cut out and go to Gentleman Jim's for dinner instead, and then we could play trivia after. But then another woman showed up, and she had no interest in Gentleman Jim's.

This woman happens to be Roman's financial advisor. And I am beginning to think ALL money management people are ditzy. We were looking at the placemats, and I remarked that I was born in the year of the monkey, and Tom said something about astrology, and she asked him what his birthdate was, and he told her, and said, "You know, that's the second time you've asked me that. We had this same conversation last time I saw you." She didn't remember, but she almost immediately turned to me and asked if I was married (this woman is famous for non sequiturs). I said "No, why do you ask", and she replied that that's why she didn't want to go to GJ's, because she wanted to get home to her husband.

I started laughing, and said "You've also asked me that before." The last time I had seen her, she had turned to Roman and me, and had said "My husband wants to know if you two are married." That was back when Roman was courting me big time, and it was obvious to everyone at the table that something big was going on. And I remember it especially because she, as his financial advisor, should have known his marital status, so it struck me as odd. Her response was "Oh, no. I would NEVER have asked if you and [Roman] were married, because I know [Roman] has a girlfriend, [so-and-so]. I know her because her ex-husband goes to my church. If I asked, it was just a joke."

I had a flash of anger. I said "Yes, but it wasn't a joke. Sorry, but I'm feeling a bit bitter right now. I wish you had told me about her then." She said "Oh, you do know about her?" (When you think about what she'd just said, that's a really dumb question....) I said "Yes, now I do, but I didn't know soon enough. He misled me." She asked "Does she know about you?", and I said "No, and that's so unfair, because now that I know, I got mean, and she's not, she's all sweetness and light, and he's comparing us, and that's so unfair." She sympathized. Then she said "Someone should tell her. She should know!" and she looked like she was the one to do it, and I suddenly realized that I had forgotten that this was a total ditz I was talking to. She's about the fourth person to tell me that Roman has a girlfriend, but she's the first to scare me.

I had gone too far. I asked her and Tom to please not say anything to anyone - but - she's a ditz. Sometimes I guess I am, too. My only consolation is that she has no contact with the woman, so her blathering to her is unlikely. Her blathering to or scolding Roman is a distinct possibility, however. On the other hand, she SAW us together at that dinner. She KNEW THEN that Roman and I were "involved". He walked up to me and kissed me right in front of her once. So this shouldn't be news to her. What the hell was in her mind then? What was in her mind last night, when she informed me Roman had a girlfriend named xxx? Mensa considered Roman and me a couple, so her announcing at a Mensa function that he had a girlfriend (by name, even) was very embarrassing to me. The woman is a ditz.

I am stupid. I am sick. I am a spurned woman. I am human. I know that if xxx did find out about me, and if Roman thought I was in any way responsible for her finding out, it would destroy the last shreds of our already-tattered friendship, and I don't want to lose that. Even if she throws him out (and I doubt that she cares for him enough to get angry, certainly not enough to throw out her 'faithful' servant, he's just too useful) if he thought I was responsible he wouldn't turn to me, so there's no advantage to me.

No matter what else stops, I never want to stop seeing his smile.

So, anyway, after dinner I went to trivia with Tom. He asked me if I'd like to go next Thursday, too. I said yes. There's a Mensa group in NYC who are always near the top of the national ranking, and we're considering a trip to the city to meet them and see them in action some summer Thursday. Tom is the subject of a lot of gossip in the local group, because he's been married like five times, and he's a bit of a hound. He's about 12 years younger than I, in love with a woman who shares his interest in hiking, and I don't get "hound" vibes from him at all, which is refreshing. We're trivia buddies, and I like him. He's fun.

So, today, bright and early, I took the van to my favorite garage. Unfortunately, it's also everybody else's favorite, too. The owner told me I could bring it in on Monday, but I have a volunteer meeting on Monday that I can't reschedule. The next available time is 8 am, Friday of next week, so I agreed to that. Not good.

Then I stopped by Piper's office because I just got a notice from the state that they were fining me $50 because my last business sales tax return was late. The Angel did mail the forms, but I don't know when. Neither Piper nor The Angel were there, but Vinnie was, so Vinnie and I went to lunch. Man, he can talk!
--------------------
Much later (6:30 pm):
While writing the above, I realized I could rent a wreck, which happens to be right next door to the garage. I called the garage, and the Monday slot is still available. I tried to call the car rental place, but they weren't in the book, so I ran down there and reserved a car for tomorrow. I can drop off the van at the garage tomorrow and pick up the rental, and I'm all set for Monday's meeting. (The car rental place wasn't in the book because they changed their name.)

Then I went and did a round on the exercise machines, plus 25 fast situps, and got thrown out because they were closing. They close early on Friday.

When I got home, there was a message on the tape from Roman, asking how the van was (wasn't that sweet of him?), and a message from the Hunk saying he'd be here Monday to finish the chimney work. I called Roman right back, but I guess he has already gone over to xxx's house - for the weekend, like every weekend, damn him. I left a long message. I probably won't hear from him again until Tuesday, if then.

Tomorrow is filling up. I'm going to a monster indoor flea market at the fair grounds, then I have to pick up the rental and drop off the van at 3 pm, then meet the roofer here at 4 to sign the contract. Then I'll sit here alone with PBS on Saturday night. (Fishkill would like to see me again, but he has a dance recital (per salsa lessons) on Sunday, and will be rehearsing, or I'd have invited him to share some Saturday time.)

And --- that's what I've been up to.